A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006.

Recent entries:
“The best time to exercise is whenever you can” (6/26)
“There’s no ‘I’ in team, but there are two in schizophrenia” (6/25)
“Kitchens and baths sell houses” (real estate adage) (6/25)
“The best time to work out is whenever you can” (6/25)
“I have a pen that can write underwater! It can also write other words, too” (6/25)
More new entries...

A  B  C  D  E  F  G  H  I  J  K  L  M  N  O  P  Q  R  S  T  U  V  W  X  Y  Z


Entry from March 24, 2019
“In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage?” (Polish joke)

A Polish (or other ethnicity) joke has a customer ask a store clerk, “In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage?” The clerk asks, “Are you Polish?’ The customer then erupts, claiming prejudice about ethnicity and ethnic products. “Why do you ask me if I’m Polish?”

“Because you’re in a Home Depot,” the clerk responds. That is, the customer is a stereotypical “dumb Pole” who’s in the wrong store.

The joke has been cited in print since at least 1995.


7 April 1995, Chicago (IL) Tribune, “Ethnic jokes cross border of bad taste” by Mike Royko, sec. 1, pg. 3, col. 1:
It was about the guy who walks into a joint and said to the man behind the counter: “I want a Polish sausage sandwich.”

The man behind the counter said: “Excuse me, sir, but are you Polish?”

The customer indignantly said: “What kind of question is that? If somebody came in here and ordered a salami sandwich, would you ask him if he were Italian? If someone wanted a corned beef sandwich, would you ask him if he were Irish? So just because I order a Polish sausage sandwich, why do you ask me if I’m Polish?”

The man behind the counter said: “I asked you that, sir, because this is a hardware store.”

Google Groups: rec.humor
Polish Sausage
Ingo
12/14/99
A guy goes into a store and asks if they sell Polish sausage.
The clerk asks him “Are you Polish?”.

The guy says “Why are you asking me if I’m Polish?  If someone comes in asking for Italian sausage, do you ask if they’re Italian?  Why are you asking me if I’m Polish?”.

“Because this is a hardware store.” says the clerk.

Google Groups: atl.arno
Polish?
Don Leonard
9/15/06
Yesterday I overheard a man talking to a store clerk “In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage.” The clerk looks at him and says, “Are you Polish?”

The guy, (clearly offended) says, “Well, yes I am. But Let me ask you something, if I had asked for Italian sausage would You ask me if I was Italian?

Or if I had asked for German bratwurst, would you ask Me if I was German?

Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?

Or if I had asked for a Taco would you ask if I was Mexican? Would ya, Huh? Would ya?”

The clerk says, “Well, no!”

“If I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I Was Irish?”

“Well, I probably wouldn’t!”

With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy says, “Well then why did you ask me if I’m Polish because I ask for Polish sausage?”

The clerk replies, “Because you’re at Home Depot!”

Reddit—Funny
Posted by u/mrmystic September 6, 2010
RACISM
Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to scream ‘racism’ these days.

A customer asked, “In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage?”

The clerk looks at him and says, “Are you Polish?”

The guy (clearly offended) says, “Well, yes I am. But let me ask you something. If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?

Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?

Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican?’ If I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?”

The clerk says, “Well, no, I probably wouldn’t!”

With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy says, “Well then, why did you ask me if I’m Polish because I asked for Polish sausage?”

The clerk replied, “Because you’re in Home Depot.”

28 April 2011, The Mercury (Durban, South Africa), “The nanny state rules, okay!,” pg. ?:
Customer: “In what aisle could I find the Irish sausage?”

Attendant: “Are you Irish?”

Customer: “Yes I am, but let me ask you something. If I asked for Italian sausage, would you ask if I’m Italian? If I asked for German bratwurst, would you ask if I’m German? If I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask if I’m Jewish? If I asked for a taco, would you ask if I’m Mexican? If I asked for Polish sausage, would you ask if I’m Polish?”

Attendant: “No, I probably wouldn’t.”

Customer: “Well then, when I asked for Irish sausage ... why did you ask if I’m Irish?”

Attendant: “Because you’re in Builder’s Warehouse.”

14 June 2013, Northern News (Kirkland Lake, ON), “BBQ for dads goes Saturday at Encore Club” by Bruce Morris, pg. A3:
Your weekly chuckle… Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to scream “racism’ these days...... A customer asked, “In what aisle could I find the Newfy sausage?”

The shop assistant asks, “Are you from Newfoundland?”

The guy clearly offended says, “Yes I am. But let me ask you something. If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask if I was German? Or if I had asked for a Taco would you ask if I was Mexican or if I asked for Polish sausage would you assume I was from Poland ?”

The clerk says, “No, I probably wouldn’t.”

The guy says, “Well then, because I asked for Newfy sausage, why did you ask me if I’m from Newfoundland?”

The clerk replied, “Because you’re in Home Hardware.

Reddit—Jokes
Posted by u/agoatforavillage January 13, 2015
Which aisle is the Ukrainian sausage in?
A customer asks, “In what aisle will I find the Ukrainian sausage?”

The clerk asks, “Are you Ukrainian?”

The guy says, “Yes I am. But if I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German? Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish? Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican? Or if I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?”

The clerk says, “No, I probably wouldn’t.”

The guy says, “So why did you ask me if I’m Ukrainian?”

The clerk says, “You’re in Home Depot.”

21 March 2015, (Ipswich, Queensland), “Saturday Laugh: Jumping to conclusions can cause a little embarrassment,” pg. 20:
The customer asked the young shop assistant, “In what aisle could I find the Guinness?”

Looking a little shocked she replied, “Are you Irish?”

The guy, clearly offended, says, “Yes I am.

But let me ask you something, if I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian?

Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?

Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?

Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican?

Or if I asked for Polish sausage, would you ask if I was Polish?”

The shop assistant says, “No, I probably wouldn’t.”

The guy says, “Well then, because I asked for Guinness, why did you ask me if I’m Irish?”

The clerk replied, “Because you’re in Bunnings”.

Reddit—Jokes
Posted by u/GazpachoZen March 24, 2019
A man walks up to the store clerk and asks “In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage?”
Long
The clerk looks at him and says, “Are you Polish?”

The guy (clearly offended) says, “Well, yes I am. But let me ask you something. If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian?

Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?

Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?

Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican?

If I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?”

The clerk says, “Well, no, I probably wouldn’t.”

With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy says, “Well then, why did you ask me if I’m Polish because I asked for Polish sausage?”

The clerk replied, “Because you’re in Home Depot.
COMMENTS
r0b3r71984
Its a stereotype that poles are stupid ...the guy asked if he was polish because he did something stupid

Posted by Barry Popik
New York CityRestaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores • Sunday, March 24, 2019 • Permalink